a lighter flick

I had a flickering thought today. Not really a thought, more like a bubbling in my sternum: I’m happy that you’re happy.

Not forced happiness, not resentful martyrdom happiness, but actual, unexpected happy. Like a small smile of it, just for an instant before the jealousy crept in again.

I’m happy that you’re happy.

That flicker gave me more hope than I’ve had in weeks.

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